Falling in Love With Writing

illustration of stack of books with the titles: Love, Heat, Conflict, tropes, an incredible journey, guilty pleasures, fun, escape, happily ever after

I think the first romance novel I ever read was “Lost Love Found,” and I know it was by Bertrice Small. It was one of those classic sweeping historical bodice-rippers that haven’t necessarily aged so well according to modern sensibilities. It was thrust into my hands—“You have to read this!”—by teenage girlfriends who have curiously lost all memory of the event some 25 years later. I was entranced and titillated and then I went back to my Serious Reading. Things a Smart Girl would read. I was an aspiring word person, after all.  

I’ve always been a writer, but it’s been a job; a disciplined pursuit. In college I majored in journalism, after getting scared out of an English degree during my first semester because I didn’t love Faulkner’s “The Sound and the Fury.” (Oh to understand the logic of my 18-year-old brain.) As a professional, that old writer’s adage certainly applied: “I don’t like to write, but I like having written.” Starting to write: murder. The writing process: just fine. The finished product: the best part. It’s not a terrible gig to have, though–creating something you are proud of from scratch.

Imagine my surprise when, 25 years into my life as a writer, I realized I seriously enjoyed a different kind of writing. Perhaps this was my “meet cute” with the romance genre.

In the past, I would often read the same way that I wrote. I was in an ambitious book club. I wanted to read to learn, to understand the world, and to be informed. That’s not to say that I didn’t enjoy these things. I’ve always read for enjoyment, which is why I usually stick to fiction. But at some point, the requirements I’d put on my reading became a cage. I wasn’t enjoying it much anymore, and as a result, I kind of stopped.

I am sure “Twilight” can take some of the credit for drawing me back to romance. I picked it up out of pop culture zeitgeist curiosity, or so I told myself, and fell embarrassingly in love with it. This was NOT my normal literary fare. But I wasn’t ready to dive headfirst into romance just yet. I flirted around the edges. A historical romance here; a women’s fiction book with a prominent romantic storyline there. Then I discovered the Outlander books about 25 years later than everyone else, which was a healthy nudge (despite its author’s conviction that it’s not romance).

I realize now that I was always looking for the romance in any story, be it book, movie or TV. Mystery: I’m interested in the side story about what’s happening in the detective’s love life. Thriller: where’s the love triangle? Action/adventure: these two have to get together after all that adrenaline, right?

Then I picked up Jasmine Guillory’s “The Wedding Date” on a whim, and thought, “This is delightful. And how much fun must it have been to write?” So I decided to give it a try. And guess what? It WAS fun.

I am learning so much about the process by attempting to do it. I’ve taken courses, attended author Q&As, and started following a whole corner of Twitter that I never knew existed. I even read a bit differently. And I’ve discovered that I love these writers, these readers and this community. It’s such a supportive, funny, diverse and welcoming group. My god, a romance author even saved the 2020 election in Georgia! Seriously, I feel like these writers can do anything. Even if I never see a word published, I’m enjoying the ride.

Though the pandemic has stolen my time, my motivation, and my hours spent happily tapping away at the keyboard in coffee shops, I still enjoy every moment I have to write. As we’ve all learned this year, life is too short. Do something you love. If you enjoy the journey, then whatever success you have will be the icing on the cake.

A note on this poor, neglected blog.

If you find yourself on this much-neglected blog site, why not make your way over to my other, slightly less-neglected blog, Momspringa? There I chronicle my attempts at travel, few and far between though they are. I may still post here when I need a venue, but that is more the focus of my efforts when I have the time and something to say. Cheers!

A Scottish castle framed by greenery and a rainbow.

Here’s a picture of a Scottish castle with a rainbow for you.

What Do You Do With an Idea?

IMG_0499First, I had an experience.

Then, I had an idea. (It almost started as a joke.)

Then I went back to my life. (At least I thought I did.) But the idea kept tickling me. Reminding me of itself. Even before I realized it was an idea.

Then I received just the tiniest bit of encouragement and positive reinforcement.

So now I have a decision to make. To pursue or not to pursue?

Three things make think this may not just be a crazy dream.

  1. My daughter has a book: “What Do You Do With an Idea?” It’s a very thoughtful and whimsical study of how to nurture inspiration. For a few weeks now, that phrase has been rolling around in my head: What do you do with an idea?
  2. Yesterday, I walked into the library. In the entry was a book sale, and front and center on a cart of “collectible” books was a beautiful old blue children’s chapter book: “Sarah’s Idea.” I bought it.
  3. I had subsequently almost talked myself off of the ledge of believing. But when I hopped back in the car after dropping my daughter off at school this morning, writer/director Kevin Smith was on the radio discussing how people are really good at talking themselves out of good ideas. I believe his exact words were: “We are all Lord Byron when it comes to talking ourselves out of a good idea.” I actually screamed.

I have never been one to think that the “Universe” is trying to tell me something. I am a skeptic. But at this point, it seems like I’m just being ridiculous if I don’t sit up and take notice. (Am I crazy?)

The fear: that this will become another flash-in-the-pan idea that I eventually tire of. Wouldn’t that be embarrassing? (Hey, I am good at this. How else can I shoot myself down?)

Current mood: on the fence. I’m thinking, planning, researching, and strategizing. We shall see.

Why Agent Carter Was the Best

Agent CarterAs the saying goes, all good things must end.  While I had hoped that “Agent Carter” would get six seasons and a movie, I am happy that we got two seasons (and parts ranging from major character to cameo to photograph in five movies). Still, I will sorely miss Peggy Carter, played so well by Hayley Atwell. Here’s why:

  1. The woman could hold her own—and everyone else’s. She was a strong, uncompromising female character who I have been proud to share with my young daughter. She doesn’t get rescued by Prince Charming; she gets things DONE.
  2. She had zero fucks to give. When a male counterpart asks why she lets someone take the credit for her achievement, she tells him she doesn’t need the credit, and delivers that defining line: “I know my value.” #LIFEGOALS.
  3. Femininity without fetishism. Her feminine wiles were but one tool in her toolbelt, and were used sparingly—usually on only the least formidable opponents. She did not, however, abhor femininity; in fact, her outfits, hair and makeup were the perfect mix of beauty and function. Not to mention a possible camouflage—what better way to get away with more in a man’s world than by flying under the radar and playing by the rules, at least on the surface?
  4. That 40s style. I know it’s cliche, but what a fun time to revisit in fashion and style. TV has largely abandoned the era for hipper turns of nostalgia, such as the 80s mania that never seems to go away. It’s refreshing to see something set in this time period, which also shows the all-too-real struggles that women faced when they decided they liked working but the men came home from war and were given their jobs.
  5. This is a show that didn’t take itself too seriously. As such, it was able to blend into the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and to do so seamlessly, since it didn’t have to keep up with the ever-evolving story.
  6. Not for nothing, but this was a charming cast. The baddies got a bit cartoony at times, but in that “Dick Tracy”-kinda way that made sense for a show set in the 40s. In addition to Hayley Atwell’s stellar performance, James D’Arcy as Jarvis was often comic relief, at times a calming influence, and when it came down to it, a serious moral center for the show. Dominic Cooper’s Howard Stark was comic relief’s comic relief, coming into the picture not often enough to be overbearing but just enough to leave you wanting more. Another highlight was Enver Gjokaj as Daniel Sousa, a real character to root for. Maybe some day I’ll write that fan fiction I’ve been meaning to get to wherein Howard Stark designs a bionic leg for him.
  7. That red hat! (A replica of which may or may not be living in my closet for use every Halloween or so.) DON’T JUDGE ME.

We were lucky to have the show as long as we did, due to sinking viewership from season 1 to season 2, though I don’t think it ever got the promotion it deserved. (I know, tiny violins …) A girl can dream, though I’m not expecting “Agent Carter” to get rescued by Netflix like some have suggested. I hope, however, that this show and this character are the beginning of stronger female-driven positive storylines on television. Thanks, Agent Carter. We know your value too.

UPDATE: Don’t tease us, Hayley!

Scotch Whisky Tasting in Edinburgh

I’ve never been much of an alcohol connoisseur. Drinker, yes. Expert, certainly not. I like a few beers, generally in the wheat and blonde families. I enjoy wine when the time is right, but know nothing about it. So Scotch whisky tasting was a relatively new experience for me. It was a lot of fun, and I realized that a beverage can be sipped, not gulped, and still be enjoyed; and it doesn’t need to be mixed with something, either. (Just a little ice will do, though I know some would even frown upon that.) Here are the varieties we tried and the places we tried them, plus very general reviews. I will not be talking about “notes” or “finishes” as I honestly have no idea what that means.

Location: The Dome, 4 George St., New Town

We were served by a less than friendly bartender who nevertheless got us off to a great start.

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Dalwhinnie 15yo at the Dome

  • Whisky #1: Dalwhinnie 15yo
    A light, mild, high-quality beverage.

Location: The whisky bar at Amber Restaurant, in the Scotch Whisky Experience, 354 Castlehill

Our well-versed and friendly bartender Caleb selected a range of four whiskies for us, and kindly answered all of our (mostly basic) questions. 

  • Whisky #2: Auchentoshan 12yo
    This was a strong lead-off for our tasting. Smooth and drinkable; good for first time tasters, for sure. Distilled in Glasgow; aged in bourbon casks.
  • Whisky #3: Scapa Skiren
    This may have been our favorite of the day. Light and smooth and enjoyable. Distilled in Orkney; matured in first-fill American oak casks.
  • Whisky #4: Glenfarclas 21yo
    The priciest and oldest of the whiskies we tried, this one was good but not our favorite of the day. Distilled in Speyside.
  • Whisky #5: Caol Ila Moch
    This was by far our least favorite of all the whiskies we tried. Described as smoky and peaty, I might describe it as “bacon-y.” I’m glad we tasted it; it helped us figure out what we did NOT like. Distilled on the Isle of Islay.

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The lineup at the whisky bar at Amber Restaurant, in the Scotch Whisky Experience (steps from the entrance to Edinburgh Castle)

Location: The Queens Arms, 49 Frederick St.

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Two happy travelers at the Queens Arms

Our friendly, patient and helpful waiter recommended amazing whiskies and fabulous food. One of our favorite dining and drinking spots of the trip. This was the hungry, thirsty end of a long day, and I don’t remember anything specific, other than my notes on the back of a receipt. I will share them verbatim here, and I’m sure you’ll find them illuminating.

  • Whisky #6: McCallan Gold—Speyside. “:)”
  • Whisky #7: Glenkinchie (I can’t remember which.)—East Lothian. “:)?”
  • Whisky #8: Balvenie Doublewood (My friend drank, I tasted.)—Dufftown. “:)”
  • Whisky #9: McCallan Amber (My friend drank, I tasted.)—Speyside. “:)”

Additional notes: All went well with haggis lollipops.

The bottle I came home with

I ended up bringing home a bottle of Dalwhinnie 15yo, my first love, purchased in the most convenient location of the duty free shop at Heathrow Airport. When I got home, I bought some large ice cube trays so they would melt more slowly. I cracked it open last week. I’m happy with my choice. Sláinte!

 

 

Traveling in the UK – Part Two

In early March, my friend Jenn and I spent a wonderful 10 days in the United Kingdom, exploring London, Bath, the Cotswolds and Edinburgh. It was an amazing trip and I am already plotting how I can get back. In the meantime, I’m sharing some experiences and lessons learned, and generally geeking out on Anglophilia. Here is the second half of my musings.

Best decisions we made on our trip

  1. GOING. Moms need a break. Moms sometimes don’t take time for themselves. Moms should do this. Everyone should do this, if they can.

 

  1. Not going for too long. I know people are tempted to take long trips to get their money’s worth out of pricey international flights, but I know my limits. I have only been out of the country three times in my life, and have historically gotten a bit fed up with international travel at about day seven anyway. Add to that the stress of being away from my kid when I am, in general, NEVER away from her for longer than eight hours, and a super-long vacation just didn’t make sense. Ten days including travel was long enough to enjoy and just long enough that the missing didn’t become unbearable. Just don’t try and cram too many destinations into those 10 days.

 

  1. Going off-peak. I live in Los Angeles. I don’t need to seek out sunshine. Sometimes I need a raincation. Also, a cold and damp England feels right. Avoid the crowds, save a little money, and go off-season.

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    The amazing Edinburgh Castle, and my post-blow out hair is on point. (Priorities, I know.)

  2. Getting a blow out halfway through. No, seriously. I did not have the proper equipment to power hair styling tools; nor did we need to do so—the weather was cold enough that we didn’t get too sweaty. Getting a blowout meant we didn’t have to sacrifice a flat iron to the voltage gods, we got a relaxing head massage, and we got to chat up a few locals in a slightly less touristy setting. ALL THE CREDIT GOES TO MY TRAVEL PARTNER JENN FOR THIS IDEA. I bow to her brilliance.
  3. Not getting a tattoo. I joked that this was a “Moms Gone Wild” trip but we were VERY tame. My traveling companion did get a lovely and meaningful tattoo, though; if I had made the decision to join her it would have been totally spur of the moment and probably something I would regret. But she couldn’t be happier with hers!
     

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    Our Edinburgh AirBnB, which I will not tell you the exact location of, as I don’t want you to steal it from me.

  4. Staying in AirBnBs. The review system and filters for searching make it really easy to find a great place with exactly what you want. Our apartments were amazing and centrally located, they had more character than the average hotel, and the hosts were friendly and helpful. We stayed in regular hotels in London, but I’ll definitely do AirBnBs for at least part of my next trip.
  5. NOT DRIVING. Again, knowing our limits is important. We knew that driving would have gotten us possibly stressed out, frequently lost, and potentially injured. (We could barely remember which direction to look when crossing the street most of the time.) Luckily, most of the rest of the world is pretty easy to get around by public transportation.

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    Sitting in a standing stone at Avebury, the oldest and largest stone circle in the world.

  6. Taking a day tour. We decided, due to our lack of a car and general knowledge of the area, to experience Stonehenge by day tour, and I’m SO glad we did. Mad Max Tours had just what we needed—Stonehenge, Avebury, Lacock, Castle Combe, and a relaxing ride in a warm and comfy 18-passenger van filled only halfway, mostly with other anglophile Americans like myself. This was a great way to experience the area, guided by a local, without the stress of finding our own way. And driving by the real Solsbury Hill while listening to Peter Gabriel’s song of the same name was an unexpected and magical moment.

 

  1. Scotch whisky tastings. If you don’t know what you like, ask an expert a lot of questions. We chose Amber, the bar at the Scotch Whisky Experience. Perhaps on the touristy side, but then we felt less pressure to not ask dumb questions, and they had an amazing selection. (More to come on that in my next post.)

 

What I learned about myself 

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HAGGIS at the Queen’s Arms, Edinburgh

  1. I like history!
  2. My dessert follow-through is weak. (Thanks for pointing this out, Jenn.)
  3. I like haggis! (In a gastropub, deep-fried.)
  4. I like Scotch whisky!
  5. I can DO it. This may sound silly; but I’d never traveled internationally without my husband before. I’d never really traveled ANYWHERE before under my own steam. I decided I wanted to go on this trip; I planned it; and I handled nearly all of the logistics. And it turned out pretty great! There were a few bumps along the way, but nothing insurmountable. The trip was so great, I can’t wait to do it again.

Traveling in the UK – Part One

UK, You Take My Breath Away

In early March, my friend Jenn and I spent a wonderful 10 days in the United Kingdom, exploring London, Bath, the Cotswolds and Edinburgh. It was an amazing trip and I am already plotting how I can get back. In the meantime, I’m going to share some experiences and lessons learned, and generally geek out on Anglophilia.

Top moments that took my breath away

1.  The Tate Britain—My travel partner’s flight was delayed getting into London, so I took the opportunity to explore on my own. From our hotel near Victoria Station, I walked toward the Thames, and wound my way beside it for a bit, happening upon the Tate Britain art gallery (not to be confused with the Tate Modern). My very first real destination in London didn’t disappoint. It housed, among other things, the oldest full-body portrait of Queen Elizabeth I, and there was a haunting installation of sounds made from musical instruments damaged in war. I wasn’t on this trip for art museums but I was glad I ended up in this one.

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View from the Eye at night.

2.  The London Eye at night—I know that the eye is a tourist trap, but for good reason.As everyone in London seemed eager to share, it was only supposed to be there for a year to celebrate the Millennium. However, it was such a hit that they decided to keep it. We went on Sunday, but waited until dusk; there was no line, and we got to watch night fall on the city from above. What a treat—seeing the lights of London from 443 feet up in the air.

 

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STONEHENGE. It’s right behind me, isn’t it?

 

3.  Stonehenge and Avebury—I am struggling for the words to describe this experience. We got to Stonehenge right as it opened, picked up our audio guides, and started walking around the stones. In what seemed like an instant, an hour and 15 minutes had passed. It is just … SO … OLD. Nothing standing in America is a fraction as ancient. It makes you feel connected to humanity through the ages; and also intensely curious about moved these people to move these stones, long before the time of Jesus Christ. Avebury was a different experience, but also amazing; much larger; much older; much less in tact. But you can actually walk up to those stones, and imagine how the village they inhabit grew up around them (and also threatened them.) I would go back and do this again in an instant. I treasure the speck of white chalky mud that still sits on my boot from this rainy day visit among the standing stones.

4.  The Cotswolds—We visited a few of these villages, and drove through others, on our tour to Stonehenge and Avebury. This is like going back in time to every British period drama you’ve ever loved. Literally, too—many movies and TV shows, from BBC dramas to Harry Potter, have been filmed in places like Lacock because it remains so unchanged from 300 years ago. Just wandering the streets is a treat.

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Castle Combe- tiniest of the tiny villages we visited.

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Roman Baths

5.  The Roman Baths—this highlight of the city of Bath is another must see. To think of Romans enjoying the natural hot springs about 2,000 years ago in this magnificently excavated site conjures images of summer at the neighborhood pool, mixed with a church, with a dash of reality TV thrown into the mix. (Visitors would inscribe curses and offer them to the gods there; of those that have been discovered, most complain about theft, and wish some of the WORST things that could possibly happen to a person on the thief.)

 

6.  Mass at Westminster Abbey—It’s great to take tours of amazing places. It’s even better to experience them as they were meant to be—to hear a symphony in a historic concert hall, or in this case to worship in a sacred space meant just for that. Though we didn’t get to poke around in every nook and cranny, we were able to hear an amazing choir’s voices echoing against its historically infused walls.

 

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Westminster Abbey. (This was before I realized we weren’t supposed to take pictures.)

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Abbey ruins at Holyroodhouse.

7.  Holyroodhouse Palace—Castles are awesome. Most of them that you can visit are no longer in use. Hollyroodhouse, however, is different. It is a working palace, home to Queen Elizabeth II when she comes on her annual summer visit to Edinburgh. The palace’s timeline stretches from the early 1500s and King James IV to present day, and was the residence of Mary Queen of Scots for a time. The Abbey ruins adjacent to the palace itself are far older too.

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Just the castle overlooking our historic town. NBD.

 

8.  The Streets of Edinburgh—This city was simply magical. London is lovely and while it has swaths of ancient Britain, it also has the flavor of any major metropolitan international city. Edinburgh feels like … Scotland. And history. I love the smell of history in the morning. Every street was a postcard. At every turn was yet another breathtaking building, or monument, or mountain.

 

9.  Food. And more Food. England is not known as a culinary destination; but I suspect times have changed as tourists become more demanding and residents become more discerning. Also, if you’re looking for a meal that will warm you up on a cold rainy day, then the UK has EXACTLY what you need.

10.  The Tron Market—in 2015, an underused church in the center of Edinburgh was converted into an indoor market for artists. The selection here was amazing; we also met a friendly Scottish artist, Christopher Rutterford, who explained his painting based on Robert Burns’ poem “Tam O’ Shanter,” and I tried an Irn-Bru, a popular Scottish soda. What more could you need? It says a lot that 17th century gothic churches are so run-of-the-mill in Edinburgh that they go unused and get turned into markets.

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Tron Market (featuring partial of “Tam O’Shanter” by Christopher Rutterford)

Things I’ve Been Doing Instead of Blogging

  1. Working full-time
  2. Parenting
  3. Worrying about parenting and how wrong I’m doing it
  4. Facebook
  5. Reading books (oh, who am I kidding)
  6. Reading Internet articles (headlines only)
  7. Journaling (hahahaha)
  8. Watching Making a Murderer
  9. Playing with my hair
  10. Planning dream vacation
  11. Figuring out what the kids are watching/reading/listening to these days
  12. Trying to decide weather or not to start dying my grey hairs
  13. Researching toddler dance classes
  14. Sleep

On Indiana’s recent “religious freedom” legislation (It always goes back to “The Simpsons”)

The_Simpsons_MEMEI’ve heard this argument—“Why would you want to give your money to a business that doesn’t want to serve you anyway?” Well, in theory, no, you don’t. However, allowing this to be “the answer” just leads to the type of isolation, separation and de facto segregation that makes people think that discrimination is OK or justified. Because I think there are a lot of people in the world who don’t know, or at least think they know, any gay people very well. They don’t have much opportunity to interact with them, and so they find it easy to make judgements about a faceless group of people. (Or to judge them based on some stereotype they saw on a sitcom once.) But if they were forced to interact with real people on a regular basis, then they would get to KNOW them. They would realize that they are human beings too. Some of them are good, some of them are bad, just like every demographic, race, religion, etc. But you owe them the opportunity to prove you wrong.

To quote a poignant episode of the Simpsons:

“Homer, I won your respect, and all I had to do was save your life. Now, if every gay man could just do the same, you’d be set.”

-from “Homer’s Phobia,” season 8, episode 15

My Own, Unscientific, Attainable, Better-than-what-I-was-doing-before Fitness Challenge

My commitment to health and wellness in the New Yearhyphy:

1. One yoga class a week. (We have just moved down the street from a fabulous yoga studio, Yoga Blend, so this helps.)

2. One at-home cardio session a week. (Something as easy as this video from SparkPeople.com, just to start out with.)

3. One long walk with my kiddo a week.

4. One at-home Pinterest-y toning session a week OR one bike ride a week. (Like this. Or this. Or this.)

This commitment fits three very important requirements:

1. Variety (I get bored easily.)

2. Attainability (It’s just one of each!)

3. Accountability (I’ve put it on the Interwebs, so now you all have to hold me accountable!)